


Animal Hackers

by ClagJanetSMK



Series: The Sundance Stories [6]
Category: Scarecrow and Mrs. King
Genre: Adventure, Childcare, Computers, F/M, Humor, Sex as a Major Disappointment, The ACM Kid
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-02-15
Updated: 2019-02-15
Packaged: 2019-10-29 03:25:13
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,057
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/17800187
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ClagJanetSMK/pseuds/ClagJanetSMK
Summary: Sometimes it takes a village to help a child. The Sundance version of "The ACM Kid".





	Animal Hackers

Amanda drove down the street of the sunny suburban neighborhood, humming along absently with the song on the radio, her mind on the long list of things she needed to get accomplished that week. It had been quiet for a few weeks at IFF when Lee had gone to Arizona with the Vigilant, but he was home again and he'd brought a huge pile of paper covered in chicken scratch that he claimed were his observation notes from the trip. It was going to take her days to get them all transcribed, but at least they made for interesting reading - once she'd figured out what the heck he'd written.

She still found it hard to believe that she had ended up working for an intelligence agency, based almost entirely on her ability to read the terrible handwriting of one of the most seasoned agents. She had joked about that once with Billy Melrose, that she dreaded the day Lee ever learned to type properly and put her out of a job. He'd laughed but had turned serious almost immediately and leaned in confidentially. "You know, Amanda, I know I told Lee that's why I was happy to hire you but the truth is, I hired you because he needs you. You make him laugh."

Amanda stared at him nonplussed. "You hired me as a joke?" she asked uncertainly. Something of her confusion and hurt must have shown on her face because Billy had rushed to reassure her,

"Oh no, no, I didn't mean it like that, Amanda! I mean that you seem to have some knack of keeping Scarecrow on an even keel. That first day I met you in his hospital room and you were both covered in chocolate cake and laughing – well that was the first time in a long time I'd seen Lee looking like his old self."

"Seriously? He could barely stand up without getting dizzy and falling over and that was his old self?"

"I can't explain it Amanda, I just know that after Eric was killed, Lee was still a very good, very focused agent with an excellent track record, but he was different – colder, more clinical. Those can be excellent qualities in an agent, don't get me wrong, but it was like he'd forgotten _why_ he was in the business. When you showed up, it was as if he suddenly remembered that it's not all Mad magazine Spy vs Spy nonsense – you put a face on the people we're working to protect here."

"So I'm here because I'm normal?" Amanda shook her head disbelievingly, while Billy chuckled.

"This can be a crazy place, Amanda, you bring a healthy dose of normal for all of us, believe me."

She was so deep in thought that she almost didn't stop in time as someone ran from the alley halfway along the block and out in front of her car. She slammed on the brakes and looked up to meet the dark eyes of a young boy as he stood, hands on the hood of her car, breathing heavily and looking absolutely terrified.

He glanced back up the alley he'd run out of then back at her, wild-eyed. "Help me," he mouthed.

Amanda looked up the alley in time to see a man emerging from a back gate, gun in hand. "Get in," she said without hesitation, reaching across to fling open the passenger door.

The boy ran around the car and flung himself into the front seat beside her. "Lie down," she ordered as she pulled away. She took another look up the alley in time to see the gunman look her way, then turn and start to run the opposite direction away from her, obviously on the hunt. She drove a few blocks, listening to the panting breaths of the boy whose dark head lay on the seat beside her before finally slowing and drawing the station wagon up the curb.

"Ok, we're far enough away, I think. Who was that man and why was he chasing you?"

The boy straightened up slowly and leaned back against the passenger door with a frightened expression. "I don't know who he was." He met her look of skepticism and quickly went on. "I mean, I've never seen him before but I'm sure he works for the man who…" He stopped abruptly and the worried look on his face deepened. "I have to go. Thank you for helping me."

He turned and reached for the door latch, but Amanda was too quick for him. Lunging across the car, she grabbed the waistband of his jeans with one hand and pulled the car door shut again with the other. "Oh no you don't, Buster! You don't get to just jump in my car, tell me you're being hunted by a man with a gun and waltz back out onto the street!"

"Lady, you gotta let me go! Those guys mean business and you don't want to get mixed up in this!" He was still trying to get out of the car frantically.

"Seems like I'm already mixed up in this, Mister! Now look, you asked me to help you and I have, and I can help you more if you just let me, okay?" She waited until he had given her a reluctant nod before letting go of his waistband and putting the car back into drive. She glanced sideways at him. "And put on your seatbelt."

He gave a little laugh as he obeyed her order. "Wow, if the car hadn't given you away as a mom, that sure did."

"You got me, I'm a mom." She gave an encouraging smile. "Now what's your name?"

"Alexei," he admitted.

"Okay, Alexei, I'm Amanda. Now I'm going to take you back to my house, alright? And you can tell me why a man with a gun is chasing a little boy…"

"I'm not little! I'm twelve!" he interrupted her in an injured tone. He met her skeptical look and continued. "I'm just short, that's all."

"Alright then, you can tell me why a man with a gun is chasing a _very_ _young man_ down an alley in suburban Virginia," she finished. "And then we can get you some real help."

"We can't call the cops, Lady!" He was becoming frantic again and Amanda feared he might actually try and jump from the moving vehicle.

"Ok, no cops. But I know some people who know some people, you know? They'll help you."

Alexei stared at her through narrowed eyes. "You know some people? Like the Mafia?"

"Well, more like James Bond actually." She smiled at him encouragingly and was relieved when he seemed to relax a little bit.

"How would you know anyone like James Bond?" he asked. "You're a mom with a station wagon!"

"How do you know this isn't just a perfect cover?" she answered, brows raised. "For all you know, my hands are registered as lethal weapons with the FBI."

He didn't have an answer for that and settled back into the car seat looking at her thoughtfully.

* * *

 

"Lee Stetson please, this is Amanda King."

"I'm sorry Mrs. King. Mr. Stetson is out of the office, Can I take a message?" Linda in reception had a cool tone to her voice, no doubt because she was currently dating Lee and was never happy when he talked to any other female. In her few short months at the Agency, Amanda had seen it all before and knew Linda was doomed to failure – Lee did not respond well to clingy women, unless of course the clinging was of the momentary and mutual variety.

Amanda chewed her lip for a moment, watching the young boy who was sitting at her kitchen table, wolfing down brownies and a glass of milk.

"Um, is Francine Desmond there?" she asked finally.

"Let me put you through."

Amanda heard the click of the call being transferred and then to her relief, Francine picked up on the first ring.

"Francine, it's Amanda. Look, I have a little problem at my house and I can't get hold of Lee and I know that you don't really do the kid thing but I think he's in really big trouble and he won't let me go to the police, but there was this man…" she stopped as Francine's brusque tones interrupted her.

"Amanda! You know I'd love to help you with whatever little domestic problem it is that you're having with your boys, but we're really swamped down here with…"

Amanda interrupted her in turn. "It's not one of my boys, Francine, it's a different boy and he's in really big trouble…"

"Amanda, I'm sure you can handle it, but I really can't help you. The Agency is in full scramble looking for some kind of missing Russian computer programmer and his family whose house got shot up today in Maclean so unless…"

"Francine, what's the name of your missing Russian?" Amanda turned her back on the kitchen and lowered her voice.

"You know I can't tell you that, Amanda – it's need to know."

"Okay, but if I can guess, will you come help me with this problem I'm having?"

She could hear the eye roll right down the phone line. "Oh for heaven's sake, who are you? Rumpelstiltskin?"

"Kalnikov" replied Amanda.

There was a long silence and then Francine said in a resigned tone, "We have every available agent out looking for a missing Russian and he's just sitting in your kitchen, isn't he?"

Amanda looked over her shoulder to where Alexei had picked up one of Philip's comic books and was leafing through it. "Well, I think his son is. And this stray puppy needs some K-9 squad intervention pronto."

"We'll be there as soon as we can."

"Francine? When you say 'we', maybe just a couple of you, okay? He's pretty frightened and I think something really bad has happened to his parents."

"So good cop, good cop?"

"Yes, please. He's pretending to be brave but he's only a little boy."

"Roger that. See you soon."

Amanda put down the phone and turned to give Alexei an encouraging smile. "Cavalry's on the way."

* * *

 

Francine arrived not too long after. "I'm no good with kids but I figured he's immature enough to be able to talk to him," she gestured at Efraim who was walking in behind her and who accepted the designation with a grin.

"I always knew my special skills would impress a girl someday," he said in a confiding tone.

"Well, you have to demonstrate them first," said Francine fondly. "So where's the kid?"

Amanda led them through to the kitchen where Alexei looked up from his comic book with a frown. "I thought you said you knew James Bond. Who's this? FBI Barbie?"

Francine's brows snapped together angrily while Efraim barely contained his snort of laughter before leaning over and saying in a confiding tone, "You know what, Kid? I have seen this woman incapacitate a guy with nothing more than a syringe and a bad mood, so you might want to be a little more polite."

Alexei looked at him disbelievingly, then turned to Amanda who nodded in confirmation. "She was in a _really_ bad mood after the guy insulted her spy skills. You should probably try and be nicer - it's way better when she's on your side"

Alexei looked back at Francine, more warily this time. "Ok."

Francine settled herself at the table beside him, while Efraim slid into the chair opposite. "So your parents are Vassily and Galina Kalnikov, right?"

Alexei nodded.

"And they were kidnapped out of your house in Maclean this afternoon?" she prodded, answered with nothing more than a silent nod. "And do you know who it was that took them? Or why?"

Alexei's eyes flicked over to meet Amanda's, then he gave a slight gulp and looked back at Francine. "I have no idea."

"Alexei!" said Amanda in exasperation. "When I picked you up, you told me "those guys mean business"! You must know who they are!"

The mulish expression on the boy's face didn't change. "I can't tell you who they are."

"Can't or won't?" asked Efraim. There was only silence from the fidgeting boy. Francine met Efraim's look across the table and rolled her eyes. He jerked his head slightly towards the kitchen and she nodded and got up.

"Amanda? Do you have any coffee on?" She got up and pulled Amanda into the kitchen, leaving Efraim alone with Alexei.

"So you can't tell us who those guys were, hey? Can you tell me if you think they'll harm your parents?"

Alexei shook his head slowly. "I don't think so."

"Well, that's good. We'll stay positive about that – until we hear otherwise, you know your parents are fine."

"Sort of like Schrodinger's Cat," said Alexei.

Efraim leaned back in his chair and stared at the boy shrewdly. "Yeah, just like that. Do you figure your parents will give those guys what they want?"

Alexei shook his head again. "They can't and those guys know it."

"Did your parents give you whatever it is that those guys want?"

Alexei gave a short laugh. "You could say that."

There was a knock on the front door and Amanda went to answer it. She found Lee on the doorstep, holding a huge stuffed panda. "What on earth is that for?" she asked laughing.

Lee peered around it and edged his way through the door. "Billy said you had a little boy here and I should bring stuff to get him to relax and trust us."

"Oh," said Amanda knowingly. "Um, okay, good idea but the thing is… he's not _that_ little."

By this time, Lee had managed to find his way safely over the steps and into the family room and was staring in confusion at the boy who was obviously much older than the child he'd been expecting. Amanda relieved him of the bear and gestured towards the table. "Efraim's trying guy talk to get him to trust us." She walked into the family room, holding the panda out in front of her to admire. "This reminds me of one of those midway prizes my boyfriend used to try and win for me so he could get to first base later."

"Did it work?" Lee couldn't help asking, a dimpled grin crossing his face.

"Well, that depended on the size of the prize," Amanda answered, her demure expression at odds with the laughter in her voice. "But play your cards right and this one would probably get you all the way to third base." She paused, amused at the way his eyebrows had shot up into his hairline before adding, "with Linda."

Her hunch that Linda was already on the way out was confirmed when Lee gave a theatrical shudder. She noticed Efraim get up from the table and go into the kitchen, gesturing to them to go join him.

"Here's the thing," began Efraim in a quiet voice, trying not to let Alexei hear him. "I'm pretty sure that whoever those guys were, it's not the Kalnikovs they were after."

"Well then, why is Alexei so frightened of them?" asked Amanda, her maternal instinct in overdrive.

"If I'm right, it's him they were after," replied Efraim. He shrugged at the expressions of shock on the faces of the other three adults. "He's smart. Like way too smart for a twelve year-old. He makes jokes about Schrodinger's Cat and he understood my Richard Feynman references." He looked back at the blank faces around him and laughed softly. "Trust me – he's some kind of a genius."

"Takes one to know one," muttered Francine.

There was a moment of silence and then Lee said, "So whoever the bastards are that took his parents, they'll probably try and use them to make him cooperate?"

Amanda was surprised by the amount of anger in Lee's voice and looked at him with concern. He was staring across the kitchen at Alexei with an unreadable expression but the muscle in his jaw was jumping. Francine laid a hand on his arm and said softly, "Lee, it won't come to that now that we're helping him. His parents will be fine."

Amanda looked at Efraim who looked just as puzzled as she felt.

Lee straightened up and shook himself before looking around at the other three, his expression still slightly stormy. "Ok, what do we do next?

"Well he needs somewhere else to stay," said Amanda. "I mean I'd love to keep him here but how would I explain it to my mother?"

Lee nodded decisively. "He can stay at my place. That way I can keep an eye on him, keep him safe, that sort of thing."

"Are you sure?" asked Francine. "We don't want to rescue him from the Russians only to have him catch bubonic plague from something in your fridge."

"Very funny, Francine," Lee answered, but the scowl on his face had lightened at her jab. "Kids have amazing immune systems."

"I hope so," she answered, smirking. "But maybe we should take him for a tetanus shot on the way anyway."

* * *

 

Amanda looked around Lee's apartment the next morning and giggled quietly to herself; Francine had not been exaggerating it seemed. The entire place reminded her of the student housing from her college days. She gently pushed a pile of clothes with her toe and watched it cascade over like dominoes, taking out a pyramid of takeout boxes that had been piled haphazardly around the garbage can that was too full to hold them.

"Yeah, yeah, I know," said Lee embarrassedly. "I kind of let the place get away from me a little since I got back." He began hurriedly picking up the cardboard containers and tossing them into a large garbage bag.

"A little, Scarecrow?" she asked in an amused tone as she opened the fridge to put away groceries she'd brought, then flinched at the scent of something that had obviously been in there too long. She leaned in and gingerly picked up what appeared to be the source. "This says Camembert on the label but has Dr. McJohn sent you home with one of his bio experiments?"

Lee snatched the package out of her hand. "Hey! I'll have you know I had to smuggle that very expensive cheese home from France in a diplomatic pouch!" but then as the smell hit him, he flinched and dropped it into the garbage bag without hesitation while Amanda grinned.

There was a tap on the door and Lee crossed the apartment to let in Francine and Efraim who were carrying large photo albums.

"I figured if Alexei could spot a mugshot of the guys from his house and tell us who they are, it would help us figure out what it is that he knows that they want so bad," she explained, dropping the stack onto the coffee table that Lee was rushing to clear for her.

"Good idea," he agreed.

Alexei wandered out from the bathroom, wrapped in one of Lee's robes, hair sticking up from the shower. "Hi Mama Bear, Hi Goldilocks," he yawned.

"Hey, what did I tell you about being more polite to my girlfriend?" asked Efraim in a warning voice.

Alexei's mouth dropped open. "She's your _girlfriend_? Seriously?" he looked from Efraim to Francine and back again. "No way!"

"Way," said Efraim in an amused tone. "Thanks for the vote of confidence."

Alexei stared at him, new respect evident on his face. "Dude! All this time I thought you were R2D2 and now I find out you're Han Solo!"

"R2D2? Why?" Francine laughed.

"Smart sidekick, super nerdy. You know."

"So that makes me Princess Leia, right?"

"Yeah, I guess so. Or Boba Fett since you're like a bounty hunter." Alexei was relaxing as the banter went back and forth.

"What does that make Lee then?" asked Amanda. "Chewbacca?"

Francine gave an inelegant snort. "Well he's got the growling part down but he doesn't have the body hair to be a Wookie!"

"Hey!" protested Lee. "I have body hair!"

"Sure you do, Fuzzy Wuzzy," smirked Francine. "That's what all of us who've dated you remark on." She blew a kiss at him across the room and turned back to the mugshot albums. It took her a beat to realize Efraim and Amanda were both staring at her. "What?" she asked in a confused tone.

"You two dated?" asked Efraim.

Francine looked more confused than ever. "You knew that. It was years ago." She took in the expression on his face. "You didn't know that?"

"I didn't know that," replied Efraim flatly.

"I'm sure I told you that! And there's no way none of the office gossips never told you!"

"You know I don't listen to office gossip," said Efraim, still in that same toneless voice.

"Well it doesn't matter anyway. Like I said, it was years ago and it didn't mean anything. We tried it, it didn't work, I dumped him..."

"Hey!" protested Lee. "You did _not_ dump me! We broke it off by mutual agreement!"

"It was only mutual because I brought it up and you couldn't agree with me fast enough!" fired back Francine.

"You didn't give me much choice, did you?"

The other three people in the room watched the bickering go back and forth like a tennis match for several more seconds before Amanda leaned down and whispered to Efraim, "I wouldn't worry too much, Han. Looks like Luke and Leia got the sibling thing down pat a long time ago."

"I think you're right," grinned Efraim, his expression considerably lighter than it had been moments earlier. "So who do you suppose you are in this universe?"

"C3PO," said Alexei firmly. He looked at Amanda and started to grin. "Worries about everybody all the time and never stops talking."

Amanda's mouth fell open as Efraim let loose a burst of laughter. "Why you little…" she lunged forward and began tickling the boy, her wiles as a mother keeping him in her grip as he tried to get away, shrieking with giggles.

In his effort to escape, he knocked the coffee table and one of the photo albums fell open on the floor. Amanda and Alexei looked down at the page and gasped at the same time.

"That's him!" they said in unison.

"That's who?" asked Lee, breaking off from his argument with Francine.

Amanda leaned down to pick up the book and point at one of the photos. "That's the guy who was chasing Alexei yesterday." Alexei nodded vehemently in agreement.

Efraim looked over her shoulder at the picture. "That's Stan Becker," he said. "He's wrapped up with Coughlan."

"Walter Coughlan?" asked Lee. "The one who specializes in stealing defense secrets?"

"Yeah," said Efraim. "Becker's one of his best goons." He turned to Alexei. "What kind of access do you have to government secrets that those guys would want?"

"I don't," answered Alexei in confusion. "When they came to the house, they said they'd seen a hack job I did with the school board computers and they wanted me to help them. They said they wanted my dad to take me to work with him and get me to hack something from inside." He looked back and forth between the adults. "But that's not government stuff. My dad works for Encom – they just do gaming programs and stuff like that."

Efraim closed his eyes for a second as if he was trying to pull up a mental file. "That's it!" he said suddenly, snapping his fingers and pointing at Alexei. "ACM is a subsidiary of Encom – and they specialize in classified security programs."

Lee gave a low whistle and looked at Francine. "Oh man – this is the big leagues now. We gotta call Billy."

Alexei turned to look at Amanda. "Who's Billy?" he asked

"He's the guy who's really in charge, sort of like Yoda," said Amanda.

"Cool," said Alexei.

* * *

 

"So this ties in to the Clemens murder then?" Billy was looking between the agents for clarification.

"Looks like it," agreed Francine. "Clemens was already under suspicion for stealing corporate secrets and it seems his gambling problem made him easy pickings for Coughlan."

"But they didn't have that kind of leverage with Alexei, of course, so they've taken his parents and are threatening him that way." Lee's voice was tight and Billy looked at him sympathetically.

"So we'll just get them back," he said soothingly. "That's what we do, Scarecrow." He gestured to the briefing notes Francine had prepared for him. "Now, what's your plan?"

"I'll go in as an ACM employee with money problems," answered Lee.

"Not another gambler – that would be too obvious," commented Billy.

"No, we're going to go with women problems – too many ex-wives and too much alimony."

"Well, that sounds right up your alley," Billy allowed himself to crack a smile while Lee gave him a mock-injured look.

"Alexei says Becker contacted him the first time at the arcade near his house so we're going to go back there and see if they try again," added Francine. "Amanda and Efraim are going in to be there acting as a dating couple to keep him under surveillance."

"Why are you involving Amanda?" queried Billy with a raised brow.

"Alexei trusts her the most," Lee was first to reply. "He misses his mom and she keeps him calm."

Billy's lips twitched. _Alexei isn't the only one,_ he thought. "Fine. Just don't let her wander off and find trouble." He looked from agent to agent before sighing. "Never mind – I don't know what I was thinking – I know it's trouble that always finds her."

* * *

 

Efraim was leaning on the pinball machine where he could keep an eye on Alexei across the room while Amanda played. He glanced down and watched the silver ball fly around the tilted playing field for a moment and then up at her score, giving a low whistle.

"Holy cow, Amanda! How are you such a pinball wizard?"

"My ex-husband had to study a lot when he was in law school, so I used to spend a lot of time at Dooley's on campus. I got really good at making a quarter last a really long time." Amanda grunted as she gave the machine a gentle check with her hips.

"Does Stetson know? You could get another dinner out of it. He's still recovering from that walloping you gave him on the golf course."

Amanda gave a low laugh without taking her eyes off the game. "You didn't do much better against Francine."

"Ah, but I wasn't expecting to – that's the difference," grinned Efraim, shifting his position slightly so he could keep a better eye on Alexei. "Now Space Paranoids – that's my game." He craned his neck and stared at where Alexei was whooping and yelling at the machine as he played. "But that kid could give me a run for my money for sure." He walked around Amanda, and leaned in for what looked like a light kiss on her cheek but was actually just an opportunity to whisper "I'm going to get closer" to her.

"I'll be right back, Babes," he announced in a loud voice. "I think that kid over there is beating my high score and I want to check it out."

Amanda nodded and he strolled over to stand behind Alexei, watching him taking down the familiar Recognizer flying tanks in the computer shooting game. He winced as Alexei took down the last one with a whoop of joy and began to enter his initials as the top scorer.

"Oh damnit," said Efraim. "You're AVK?"

"You know me?" asked Alexei in surprise.

Efraim pointed to what was now the second place score. "That's me."

"Dude! You've been messing with me for months!" Alexei looked at the agent with new respect.

"Right back at you, Kid," grinned Efraim. As he watched, Alexei's gaze fixed on something over his shoulder and the frightened look appeared. Alexei gulped and his eyes flicked back to Efraim's face for a moment. Repressing the urge to turn around to look for himself, Efraim pointed over at Amanda and said, "If you want a rematch anytime, I'll be _right over there_."

Alexei nodded and turned back to the arcade game to place another quarter in and begin playing. Efraim turned away slowly, chancing a look down the aisle as he returned to stand beside Amanda.

"Darn punk beat my high score and knocked me back to second," he announced loudly to Amanda, then added more quietly, "I see Becker. They're moving in for contact."

"Don't let him out of your sight," replied Amanda.

"Wouldn't dream of it," answered Efraim, just loudly enough to be heard over the racket of the arcade "Stetson would kill me."

"Yeah, what is it with him and this case?" asked Amanda with a puzzled look. "He's been like a overprotective mother bear since this started – and I don't mean a panda bear."

Efraim shrugged. "No idea. Francine knows something, I think but I would have thought you'd know better than me."

"Not yet, but I'm gonna find out," answered Amanda.

"Make that your next bet," suggested Efraim, eyes still fixed on the young boy across the room. "Beat him at pinball and loser tells all."

"That's not a bad idea." Amanda groaned and threw up her arms theatrically as the silver ball vanished from the table top. She turned around and let her gaze sweep the room as if looking for another game to play. They could see Becker leaning in and talking to Alexei who was nodding along with an anguished expression.

"Can't we just arrest him?" Amanda hissed.

"Not when we don't know where Coughlan is keeping his parents," murmured Efraim. "Don't worry so much – we just have to let the plan come together."

"Can't come soon enough."

* * *

 

"So Coughlan approached me at the bar already about getting the hack codes. Duffy and Fielder did a good job of talking up my marriage problems and Beaman built me a rock solid background in the ACM computer records."

Lee was filling Billy in over the phone from his apartment. He could see Alexei across the room, curled up on the sofa, arms wrapped around the stuffed panda. He dropped his voice and turned away so Alexei couldn't hear him. "The kid is pretty frightened, Billy. We need to get these guys fast."

"I hear you, Scarecrow. What did Becker tell him?"

"He wants him back at the arcade tomorrow. Coughlan asked me to meet him again tomorrow afternoon already so they're obviously up against some kind of deadline."

"Well, we'll keep working with ACM to figure out what they're after so we can have something for you to give them."

Lee hung up and continued to watch Alexei who was unaware of the surveillance. "Hey Kid," he said finally. "Isn't it about time to head to bed?"

Alexei jumped; he'd been so deep in thought he'd obviously forgotten Lee was in the room. He met the look of concern on Lee's face and asked abruptly, "Why do you care so much? About me and my parents? We're not even Americans."

Lee was taken aback by the question. "Well, that doesn't matter. Bad guys are bothering you and it's my job to stop bad guys."

"Yeah, but you care more than the others. Even Amanda looks at you funny when you do that thing with your cheek whenever you talk about my parents." The boy shifted his jaw back and forth in an imitation of Lee's teeth grinding.

"Well, I guess I want to get your parents back for you because I didn't get to spend enough time with mine," Lee admitted. "They died when I was little and my uncle brought me up instead."

Alexei regarded him solemnly for a moment. "Is that why you're a spy now? James Bond was an orphan, you know."

"Was he? I didn't know that. I guess that could be one reason why." Lee gave Alexei an encouraging smile. "But you're not going to be a spy when you grow up because we're going to get your parents back." Lee pointed towards the spare room. "So for now, bed."

"Okay." Alexei got up and began to shuffle slowly out of the room. "Um, Lee? If I don't get a chance later, I just wanted to say thanks for all this."

"Well, you're welcome. You were just lucky Amanda was driving along that road."

"Yeah, I was." Dark brown eyes that reminded Lee of Amanda's surveyed him from the doorway. "Can you tell her thanks from me for that too?"

"Are you ok?" asked Lee, perturbed by the look on Alexei's face. "You don't need to worry you know – we'll get your parents back and put those guys away for a long, long time. And then you can thank Amanda yourself."

Alexei sighed. "No, I'm ok. I just, well – I guess I'm just tired. Good night." He turned abruptly and vanished into the spare room, leaving Lee staring at the empty doorway speculatively.

* * *

 

"What do you mean 'gone'?" Billy's overly calm voice made it clear how upset he actually was.

"Gone like gone, Billy. I went to wake him up this morning and there's just a note on his pillow saying he's sorry but he can't risk those guys hurting his parents if they thought he was working with anyone and he's gone to do what they told him to do at the arcade last night. And then there's something about telling Jeb that 1+1 doesn't always add up to 2."

"So he lied last night about that conversation?"

"Well, he sure stretched the truth. He told us he wasn't supposed to meet up with Becker again until this afternoon. That tied in with the timing of their meeting with me, so we didn't question it. Now I'm worried that they have more planned for him than just hacking into ACM." Lee ran his hand along the back of his neck. "How did we get outsmarted by a twelve year-old?"

"Because he's not a regular twelve year-old, Scarecrow. So what are you doing to find him?"

"I'm heading to ACM to collect the dummy coding book they've put together for me. Francine and Amanda are going to the arcade to look there because he probably didn't lie about the location he was supposed to meet Becker, and Beaman is going through security footage from the stores around my apartment building to see if we can pick up anything before he takes the team down to wire up the room at that no-tell motel where I'm supposed to be living." Lee sighed down the phone line. "I just don't understand why he couldn't trust us enough, Billy."

"He's scared and he's not thinking straight and worst of all, he probably figured he's so smart he could do it all by himself. Sound familiar?"

"Low blow, Billy."

"Hey, you've been better lately. If we can find Alexei and show him we haven't abandoned him, maybe he'll learn that lesson too."

* * *

 

"Well, you know how it is, Ladies. There are a million kids in here every day – I'm sure I can't remember every single one!" The manager of the arcade, Mr. Wilson, was oozing with unctuousness. Amanda couldn't shake the creepy feeling she got from him and wondered if Lee should pull up a police file on this guy who spent so much time around children.

"Well, this kid is here all the time. He's usually playing on that Space Paranoids game over there," she said pointing to the game. "He gets the high score on it a lot," she added in case that helped jog Wilson's memory, which it appeared it did.

"Oh Alexei! Oh yes, I didn't put it together at first who you were talking about! Well, I think he was here last night but I'm sure I haven't seen him this morning. It's a school day after all!" Mr. Wilson's false joviality continued to grate on Amanda's nerves. She was sure he was hiding something but couldn't imagine what an arcade employee could have to do with stealing military secrets.

She walked over to the Space Paranoids game, watching the bulky targets fly randomly around the screen while she tried to think where Alexei could have gone, if not here. She was still staring at the screen when Francine appeared at her elbow, looking equally concerned.

"I just called Efraim. He found him on some security footage about a block from here so he must have been headed this way. The question is whether he got here or if he got snatched up before then."

"Well that arcade guy is giving me the heebie-jeebies," answered Amanda. "I can't help feeling he knows something."

Suddenly the screen changed and the list of high scores came up. Amanda stared at it absent-mindedly for a moment and then gave a loud gasp and grabbed Francine's arm.

"What did that note at Lee's say? Tell Jeb something?" she hissed.

"Uh, Tell Jeb 1+1 doesn't equal 2, something like that. It doesn't help us – we don't know who Jeb is."

"Yes we do," replied Amanda excitedly. "Efraim told me last night Alexei had just knocked him off the top score on this game!" She pointed at the list of initials. "So if AVK is Alexei, JEB must be Efraim!"

"Oh my god!" Francine stared at her stunned. "That never even occurred to me. Efraim's named after his dad but he goes by his middle name!" She looked around wildly. "I have to find a payphone – Alexei must have meant something coded in that note."

Fortunately Efraim was still in the lab helping prep the audio surveillance equipment for Lee's motel room when she called back.

"1+1 doesn't equal 2?" he asked in a confused tone.

"1+1 doesn't always equal 2" corrected Francine. "So when doesn't it? He must have thought you'd understand it when he left the note."

There was a long silence at the other end and she could picture Efraim tilted back on the back legs of his office chair, staring at the ceiling in his usual thinking pose. There was a sudden crash as she heard the chair thud forward on the ground again.

"It's binary!" exclaimed Efraim. "He's left a clue in binary code!" She could hear the amazed awe in his voice. "My God, that kid is way too smart! He must have wanted to leave a clue to where he's going but one that would take you a while to figure out."

"That's great - now what the hell does it mean?" she snapped.

"Oh! Sorry! In binary code, 1+1=10," Efraim explained. He could hear the strained silence as Francine waited for him to explain further. "It's a computer thing – code is all written in zeroes and ones. Look you don't have to understand that part, just that there has to be something with a number 10 on it involved. Does the No. 10 bus route run along there or something?"

Francine had turned and was looking around the room, thinking of all the millions of possibilities that number could lead them to when her eye was caught by a pinball machine on the far wall.

"The bus doesn't," she answered him, "But Bo Derek does!"

"What?" said Efraim in one ear at the same time as Amanda said it in her other.

"There's a pinball game here based on that Bo Derek movie," said Francine softly. She craned her neck slightly and nodded in satisfaction. "And the way it's set up, it's hiding a door to some kind of back room. I know where they're keeping him."

"Be careful," warned Efraim. "You don't know what's behind door number 10."

"Call Billy and tell him if I haven't called him in five minutes, to get backup down here."

Francine hung up and quietly filled Amanda in on her theory.

"If he's being held here, then that Mr. Wilson is in on it," muttered Amanda. "No wonder he gave me the creeps."

"You go keep an eye on him while I check out what's back there."

Amanda nodded and slipped behind a game where she could watch the white-haired man while Francine edged her way down the aisle towards the hidden door. Amanda glanced her way once or twice but Francine was back almost right away.

"They were here but now they're gone," she whispered. "It looks like they were holding at least three people so Alexei's parents must still be all right."

"How do you know it was Alexei?" Amanda whispered back then laughed softly when Francine held up a scrap of paper with a detailed schematic of the Millennium Falcon doodled on it. "Oh yeah, he was here."

"Where's Wilson?"

"He went in the back about two minutes ago and hasn't come back." Amanda pointed to the door behind the cash cage that stood ajar. They snuck forward and Francine gently pushed the door open, revealing an empty storage room and a wide-open door that gave out onto the back alley. The two of them looked at each other; Alexei was gone and now so was their only link to finding him.

* * *

 

Lee stood in front of the motel window staring at the faceless empty storefront across the street. "I assume you can hear me over there," he remarked to the empty room. Across the way, Amanda gave him a thumbs-up as his voice crackled over the radio. Not sure if he was being watched by bad guys as well, he didn't wave back, he just rocked back and forth on his feet, hands in his pockets, and gave her a grin.

Amanda turned back to where Francine was standing in the shadows, out of sight of the street, hanging over a camera with a long telephoto lens. "So that's our whole plan? We just wait for the bad guys to come get a fake coding book from Lee and then follow them back to where we hope they have Alexei?"

Efraim looked up from where he was monitoring the audio equipment at a desk in the back corner.

"We don't just follow them – there's a tracker embedded in the spine of the book that will let us trace them anywhere," he responded, spinning gently on his office chair, headphones around his neck.

"So they don't know they're being followed?" Amanda looked relieved as Efraim nodded. "And we'll get to them before they can hurt him?"

"They won't hurt him Amanda," said Francine reassuringly. "If they think he can get them into the computers at places like ACM, they'll want to use him again."

"So they'd keep him locked up somewhere?" Amanda asked, horrified. "Like a slave?"

"It won't come to that," Efraim interrupted her quickly before she could get more worked up. "We're going to find him today. Ricky Joe Jackson over there is going to give them everything they need to break into what they think is the ACM mainframe and we'll have them."

"What they think is the ACM mainframe?" repeated Amanda. "What are they really breaking into?"

Efraim gave a low laugh. "Would you believe our phone tracking software? They're going to lead us straight to them and all we have to do is kick back and wait for them to leave the breadcrumb trail."

Amanda relaxed, certain for the first time that they really would rescue Alexei and his parents. Until that is she heard the muttered "oh no" from Francine.

The blonde agent looked up from the camera with a troubled expression. "They brought Alexei."

Amanda darted to the window and stared in horror as two men bundled the boy through the door Lee had just opened.

"Who's the kid?" they heard Lee ask and they held their collective breath that Alexei wouldn't say anything to give them away.

"He's our little insurance policy," said Coughlan, walking to the window and dragging the curtains closed.

"Damn it – we've lost visual, Billy," said Francine into the walkie-talkie to where Billy was sitting in a lawn chair on the upper balcony of the motel.

"Roger that," answered Billy. "Everyone stay on their toes. Kilroy, you've got eyes on the back?"

"Yes, Sir," came the prompt reply.

The conversation in Lee's motel room continued as he kept up his act of the down-on-his-luck charmer. It was soon apparent that Coughlan had brought some kind of computer with him and was going to attempt the hack right from the motel. Efraim leapt to the phone to alert the Agency to the hiccup in the plan – someone at the other end was going to have start feeding false information in at the other end while they tried to figure out their next step.

Fortunately whoever was at other end of the phone at the Agency was very good at their job, Amanda realized as Coughlan began congratulating 'Ricky Joe' on the quality information he'd brought them. Lee had kept talking like a chatty good old boy, and Amanda slowly became aware that he was dropping little hints into what he was saying that let the eavesdroppers get some idea of where everyone was in the room.

It seemed suddenly that Coughlan had gotten what he needed because he abruptly told Alexei to stand up. "Time to get you back to your parents," he said with an insincere smile.

"So when will I get that money you promised me?" asked Lee, still in character.

"Let me just work that out with my colleague," answered Coughlan. "Alexei, you just sit there for a second, while we take care of business."

He couldn't have known that he was standing right beside one of Efraim's bugs when he said quietly to Becker, "I'll take the kid out to the car while you take care of Luke Duke over there. Just shut him up for now – we'll wait for dark to come back and move the body."

Amanda knew it was bad from the looks on the faces of the other two. "Isn't he armed?" she asked and then understood from the way they exchanged a silent look. "Oh my gosh, he won't do anything that would endanger Alexei, will he? Not even defend himself?"

Francine shook her head slowly. "If we had eyes on the room we might be able to get a shot from here but we can't go in there guns blazing, not with the kid in harm's way."

Amanda whirled and stared out the window at the closed curtains of the motel room across the street. "You need eyes? I'll get you eyes!" Before anyone could move to stop her, she had run out the door and was charging across the street towards the motel.

"Oh my God! Why does she do this EVERY TIME?" Francine's voice had risen to a scream as she watched Amanda dart across the parking lot and begin pounding on Lee's door. "I swear I am going to actually put a collar on that woman someday, and keep her on a leash!"

"What the hell is going on over there, Desmond?" Amanda could hear Billy yelling into his walkie-talkie on the balcony above her and taking a deep breath, she began yelling too as she continued to bang her fists on the door.

"Ricky Joe Jackson, I know you're in there! You thought you could hide out in another state and avoid your child support payments but your little blonde tart told me where you were hiding! Now you open this door right now!"

There was a long pause and then the door opened slightly and Becker peered out through the gap. "You got the wrong room, Lady" he muttered.

"Oh no, I do not!" said Amanda, still yelling. She jabbed a finger towards the Porsche parked in front of the room "That's his hunk of junk car and the manager told me this is his room. Now I don't know why you're hiding him, but let me tell you, I got four hungry kids at home and I am getting my money!" She took advantage of Becker's look of confusion to throw herself against the door, forcing him to stagger backwards.

She followed him into the room, meeting Lee's eyes and ignoring the pleading look he gave her not to get involved. She looked around the room until she found Alexei, cowering near the desk. "So it's true!" her voice went up several notches. "You do have another kid! I can't believe I tried to defend you to my momma!" She turned back towards Lee and continued to berate him. "I don't know how you manage to find these women, you snake in the grass! If we wasn't married, I'da left you a long time ago like my momma wanted me to, because you know what? Sex with you was always a _major_ disappointment!" While Becker and Coughlan were still recovering for this verbal onslaught, she walked over to Alexei and stuck her face right in front of his. "I suppose you think he's a great daddy, don't you? Well you know what? You can just come along with me and I'll introduce to the brothers and sisters you probably don't even know you have!"

Lee gave a strangled noise and she looked up at him. "Oh yes, I brought the kids! They're all out there in the car! Efraim and Billy and Ricky Joe Jr and little Francine are all dying to see their daddy!" She grabbed Alexei by the ear and began to drag him to the doorway, shoving him outside to safety before Coughlan or Becker could react. "Run!" she said urgently and Alexei didn't need to be told twice, racing off towards the storefront where Francine and Efraim were emerging.

She felt the hand descend on her shoulder and start to pull her back into the room, but she could see the agents scrambling towards them now and knew she just needed a few extra seconds. Swinging her body around, she clenched her fist and brought it crashing against Becker's jaw. Even as excruciating pain radiated up her arm, she watched in amazement as the goon fell backwards, eyes rolling up in his head. As the first agents reached them, she slumped to the ground, clutching her hand and watching Coughlan fly across the room from a violent roundhouse kick from Lee.

As the agent she hazily thought might be named Fred jumped over her to begin handcuffing Coughlan, Lee raced over to crouch down and try to help her to her feet. He looked down at Becker, laughing with astonishment. "Either you got in the world's luckiest hit or that guy has a glass jaw! I can't believe you took him out with a single punch." He grabbed her by the shoulders and began shaking her. "Sundance, if you ever do anything like that again, you won't have to worry about the bad guys because I will personally make you sorry! What the hell were you thinking?"

"I was thinking he was going to kill you," gasped Amanda, still cradling her hand. "We could hear them planning it on the bugs." She gulped and looked up at him, tears pouring down her cheeks.

Lee loosened his grip on her arms immediately. "Oh my God, Amanda, don't cry! You did great! You saved me and you saved Alexei and I'm not really mad at you – not very much anyway."

"I'm not crying because you're yelling at me," she wailed. "I'm crying because I think I broke my hand when I hit him!"

Lee looked down in horror at her hand which was indeed rapidly swelling. "Oh my God," he said again, putting his arm around her and leading her to a chair. He took her hand gently between his and began examining it. "I don't think it's broken," he said finally, "but we'll take you to get it x-rayed anyway, okay Kid?"

Amanda nodded, sniffling. "You guys make it look so easy to punch somebody!"

Lee couldn't hold in the chuckle at how annoyed she sounded, even through the tears "Well, maybe we should teach you how to hit, huh?"

"You mean I might have to do that again?" Amanda squeaked.

"Not if I can help it," said Lee, taken aback. "I was kidding, Amanda!"

"Still sounds like a good idea," she muttered and Lee could only nod.

"Yeah, it's probably a good idea," he agreed. He stared at her hand lying in his for a moment before looking up with a laugh. "Four hungry children, huh?"

"Yeah, and a crop in the field," laughed Amanda along with him, wincing slightly as her laughter jarred her hand. "Where's Alexei?" she asked suddenly.

"Right here," said the boy, coming back into the room with Efraim and Francine close behind. He looked down at the unconscious Becker at their feet and then back up at Amanda. "Wow, I thought you were kidding about your hands being lethal weapons!" He flushed suddenly and shifted his weight from foot to foot. "Can we go get my parents now?"

"Yeah. Let me just get Coughlan to tell us where they are," Lee muttered before stalking across the room.

As he leaned down over the cowering villain, Alexei watched with unholy glee. "I could have told him the address," he said confidentially. "But I 'm hoping he's going to hit him again first."

Suddenly aware of the bloodthirsty tone in his voice, Amanda rested her uninjured hand on his shoulder and started to turn him towards the door, only to find herself face to face with an angry Billy.

"You have got to stop doing that!" he growled at her. "I cannot take another session with Internal Affairs explaining why a civilian ended up in the middle of an operation! You could have been killed!"

Amanda looked down at Alexei who was watching all this, wide-eyed and said in a soothing tone. "Oh Mr. Melrose, it's fine. The comic relief never gets hurt!"

Billy closed his eyes and groaned. "Amanda!"

"And she's not in a red shirt," added Alexei helpfully.

Billy silently reached into his pocket to pull out a roll of antacids and popped one in his mouth. He chewed it slowly, looking from one to the other as if trying to decide how to answer them. In the end, he just shook his head and walked away, muttering to himself.

Lee arrived back at their side looking pleased with himself. "We have a team on their way to arrest Wilson and get your parents. I'll get someone to drive you over to meet them," he told Alexei.

"You're not going to take me?" asked Alexei in a disappointed tone.

"No, I'm going to take Amanda to get that lethal weapon of hers checked out and make sure she didn't break anything," answered Lee.

"Oh," said Alexei glumly. "I told my mom about you when they were holding us at the arcade and she really wants to meet you."

"She does?" Lee couldn't hide the surprise in his voice. "Why me specifically? Everybody else was just as involved in helping you."

Alexei grinned and answered in a perfect imitation of his mother's Russian accent. "Because _eef poor modderless boy can take such good care of my poor modderless boy, I will be like modder to heem too."_

Lee blanched even as he hid an embarrassed smile. "Oh. Well, you can tell your mother I've done just fine so far and I don't really enjoy being mothered very much." Noticing Amanda looking back and forth between the two of them, he tried to change the subject. "So I guess that cancels out your plans to be the next James Bond then?"

Alexei tilted his head as if considering it before giving a grin. "I suppose I don't have to be an orphan to be a spy. I could be a spy like Efraim. He protects people with his brain, right?"

Lee chuckled. "Yeah, I guess he does."

"And he got the hot girl."

"You don't want to let Francine hear you talking about her like that, Kid."

"Talking about me like what?" said a new voice behind them.

"Alexei here was just making an insightful observation about how people underestimate your intelligence because of your looks," interrupted Amanda promptly. "Weren't you, Alexei?"

"No, I just said you were hot," answered Alexei honestly, which sent Lee off into gales of laughter.

"Ah, I see you attended the same charm school as Beaman," said Francine sarcastically. "He also has a smooth way with the ladies."

"He still got you to go out with him though," Amanda pointed out.

"I lost a bet," smirked Francine. "And then he grew on me."

"I was the droid she was looking for," added Efraim walking up to them. "Ready to go, Kid?"

Amanda watched fondly as Alexei bounced across the parking lot beside the lanky agent. "Do you think Efraim was like that when he was that age?"

"From the stories his dad tells about him, I think he was exactly like that," replied Francine.

"Oho – you've met his parents?" Lee couldn't resist bugging her. "Must be serious."

Francine eyed him frostily and stalked off without a word.

"You shouldn't tease her. I think it's sweet she's met his parents," said Amanda reprovingly.

"So I should come and meet your mother?" teased Lee

"Oh God no! She'd make my life a living hell." said Amanda without pausing to think how it sounded. Horror struck, she looked at Lee who had doubled over laughing. "How do you always make me say things like that?"

"I don't know but it makes my day every time." He began to carefully steer her towards the Porsche. "Come on, Rocky. Let's go get that hand looked at."

* * *

 

Amanda was leaving Lee's apartment with a bag full of the bits and pieces Alexei had left behind.

"Are you sure you don't want to come with me? He'll be disappointed if it's just me."

"Oh no, I think I can live without being mothered by a grateful Russian babushka," Lee answered with a shudder.

"You never know, you might like it." Amanda couldn't hide her smile at his vehemence.

"I would not. I never know what to do around women like that," he grumbled.

"Really, I would have thought – oh hang on a second, you've got something on your face," chuckled Amanda. She licked her thumb and reached forward to wipe something from his cheek as Lee leaned forward without thinking to let her. She leaned back and grinned. "No, you're right. I can totally see how much you'd hate being mothered."

Lee could sense the laughter in her voice but couldn't figure out what she was laughing at – or rather, he knew it was him but he couldn't understand why.

"I'll see you at work tomorrow," said Amanda, turning to walk down the hall.

"Oh wait! Here, you can take this too. In fact, you should just keep it," said Lee, thrusting the stuffed panda bear at her.

"Really? I mean, I'd love it, but don't you want to give it to Linda?"

"Oh no, no, no - I do _not_ give that kind of present to girls I date!"

"Well thank you so much."

Once again, Lee watched her dark eyes light up with amusement and wondered what he'd done now. He watched as she turned to leave again, bear tucked under her arm, bandaged hand wrapped around its front.

"You going to name him?" he couldn't resist calling out as the elevator doors opened.

"I hadn't thought about it yet. Can't name him Fuzzy Wuzzy – he's too furry."

"Hey, don't listen to Francine! I do too have body hair!"

Amanda stopped the elevator door from closing with her free hand and beamed at him "Aww, I'm sure you do, Lee. You're probably like the Velveteen Rabbit – it's just that all your fur got rubbed off from too much loving!"

"A-MAN-DA!"

He could hear her peals of laughter as the elevator doors closed and glared at the spot she'd been standing. At least this time he knew what she was laughing at.

 


End file.
